My classy coaching and etiquette guidance continues…
Some of it you may already know, some may be new…
Regardless, it’s always very useful to freshen up your memory and re-assess your current behavior. I personally always do that, even though I know all these things inside out already. It’s easy sometimes to get lazy and fall into old habits. If you want to level up in life, you need to become classy and refine your personal brand.
10 Things To Avoid If You Want To Be Classy
1. Avoid wearing too much bling, costume jewelry & anything fake
If you can’t afford expensive jewelry, my advice is to avoid accessorizing too much! Keep it simple. Don’t wear the plastic costume jewelry you find on the high-street. it’s too obvious.
If you want to wear some jewelry, keep it tasteful and get something discreet from a midrange jewelry shop. Classy women wear pearls and diamonds, so make sure to put that on your Law of Attraction wish list to attract for your future.
2. Avoid slouching, harsh or masculine movements
A classy lady is a lady that carries herself with a feminine posture. Backs should be straight, chest up, neck long and her movements contained. Don’t be the “tom-boy” who is aggressive in how she stands, walks and talks. The same goes for slouching and posture in general.
Keep reminding yourself every time, everywhere: straighten out your back, move delicately and be feminine. If you’re finding this hard, you might have to exercise your core and back muscles. Dance classes like ballet and ballroom dancing help teach you proper feminine posture. Otherwise, pilates and barré classes can work as great sporty but graceful substitutes.
Try imitating gracious women from movies and copy their movements as much as possible. Practice in mirrors and film yourself on camera to analyze your results.
3. Avoid finishing your food
If you’re dining in expensive places and want to appear more ladylike, don’t finish everything on your plate. The only exception would be if you’re at a gastronomic experience where portions are tiny. Finishing everything, so it looks like you’ve licked the plate, doesn’t come across as very elegant or classy. Perhaps it’s more important when you’re on a date or in a social setting and less so if you’re eating out casually with your BFF.
It just looks better. Classy women are never gluttonous!
4. Avoid being loud and obnoxious (or using slang)
The problem with people who are very loud and obnoxious is that they don’t always realize it. It requires a significant amount of self-reflection to admit that you’re a little bit too much. You don’t need to be quiet and characterless, but you should never shout, use offensive language or slang.
If you’re the one who gets excited easily by a luxurious lifestyle, then make a reminder to check in with yourself once every 15 minutes and compose your energy. Take a step back when you feel you’re letting loose. You can still have a good time and express yourself flamboyantly while being sophisticated. Always be ladylike.
5. Avoid eating without utensils (or only with a fork)
In this casual society, we’re used to grabbing food on the go. True class and manners is always explored through your table etiquette.
Women who make sure to use proper utensils (and insist on using them, even when others choose to take the sloppy road) will appear more high-end than their counterparts. It will look like you’re well educated, and that’s what you want your lady-like image to signal.
(Note: an exception can be made for salads. If the food is in bite-sized pieces, then you may eat it with a fork only)
6. Avoid rejecting what’s being offered to you by the host
If you’re offered food and drink, never decline. It’s considered impolite to do so. Even if you’re on a special diet, don’t bore people with your lengthy explanations and save everyone the hassle of just accepting what’s offered to you.
It’s okay for you not to eat or drink what’s been given to you, as long as you just pretend like you’ve had a taste.
7. Avoid lying and getting caught
There is nothing more embarrassing or unclassy than being caught in a lie. I do think it can be okay to spice up a story to make it fit more with your image, but going all-in with lies where you know there is a possibility of getting caught is a big no-no.
It might be tempting to tell people you went to Harvard or live in the poshest area in town, but it can bite you in the back when reality pays you a visit!
These things happen more frequently than you think, especially these days when information is so accessible! If you have something to hide, hide it. Don’t create lies. Classy women can talk around things they don’t want to be mentioned or downplay it altogether.
8. Avoid whining, complaining & being a drama queen
This is very juvenile and bad etiquette. It’s okay to share your personal frustrations with your inner circle, but nobody wants to listen to your complaints or general rants.
Spare acquaintances this headache too, nothing is interesting when indulging in negativity even if it temporarily makes you feel better. It’s very rude behavior and signals poor manners. Classy women focus on the positive.
9. Avoid being the last person to leave
It doesn’t look good if you’re one of the last to leave a party. If you’re serious about polishing your image and want to present yourself as a respectable lady, then being the last to leave any event just looks desperate. Classy does not equal desperate.
There is nothing wrong with having a good time and enjoying yourself. Be strategic and think about your image. Stay long enough for people to acknowledge you, but leave before you become little miss desperado.
Keeping your appearance short will create mystery around your presence. Anna Wintour is a great example. She goes out often but she only stays for 20 minutes, never drinks and is always in bed by 10:15 pm. If that’s too rigid for you, then make a rule to stay for 2 hours. That’s more than enough to socialise properly without looking like the crazy party girl.
10. Avoid name dropping, bragging & trying hard to look good
When it comes to creating a classy image for yourself, it’s important to note that it has to be done delicately and never in someone’s face.
I’m sure you’ve come across people that constantly name drop and brag. Have you ever considered that person elegant? They may be dressed properly and carry sophisticated body language, but their behavior ruins everything. It’s a desperate way for validation.
Don’t be that person. Don’t make it obvious to people that you’re trying to level up in life. Be discreet and private just like rich people are. That signals class and that you’re one of them, not some newbie that’s easily impressed.